Exactly what is asked, and what it is read for.

“What kind of person is this?”

Temperament and energy — quiet or sociable, steady or restless, planned or spontaneous. How they recharge, how they carry pressure, how much they understand about themselves, and whether they own their choices or drift with them.

Why it matters. Temperament is the thing a person lives with daily, long after the practical arrangements are settled.

“What does family mean to them, and how much of it comes with them?”

Where they want parents in their daily life after marriage, and where the line sits. Living arrangements, who decides what, which traditions come into their own home, how they would handle a spouse and a parent pulling in opposite directions, and how they speak about elders.

Why it matters. Family involvement and the boundaries around it are among the most common sources of friction in an arranged match, and among the easiest to establish in advance.

“What do they expect married life to be like, day to day?”

What a healthy marriage looks like to them on an ordinary day rather than at a wedding. What makes them feel loved, what makes them feel taken for granted, and what they say they need from a partner. The qualities they admire in the people they respect.

Why it matters. Two people can agree on every practical arrangement and still want a completely different kind of companionship.

“What would they be like to talk to, and to argue with?”

How they open a difficult conversation, whether they can be moved by someone else's point, what they do after an argument, and whether they take a share of the blame rather than assigning all of it.

Why it matters. How someone handles disagreement predicts more about living with them than how they behave when everything is going well.

“How do they feel things, and how much do they show?”

How much feeling is in the way they speak about people. Whether others appear in their stories as people with their own view, whether they can name an emotion, what they do when somebody close to them is upset, and how they steady themselves under strain.

Why it matters. Emotional availability is what a partner leans on in a hard year, and it is difficult to establish from a photograph or a biodata sheet.

“What place does faith have in their life, and how do they treat people?”

What their faith means to them personally, whether it is private or practised openly, and how much of their day it shapes. Alongside it, the values visible in how they speak about others: roles at home, and whether a wife's education or career is supported in practice and not only in principle.

Why it matters. Faith and the expectations that travel with it are often treated as a requirement rather than a preference, so vagueness here is worth resolving early.

“How do they weigh things up and make a decision?”

How they reason. Whether they think in concrete steps and real examples or in generalities, whether they weigh consequences and other people, how they handle a decision their family disagrees with, how much risk they can carry, and whether their picture of the future joins up with what they are doing now.

Why it matters. A household runs on decisions, and how they get made matters as much as what gets decided.

“Why marriage now, and how soon?”

What has made them ready and whether the reason is their own rather than external pressure. The timeline they want, what has to be settled first, and how firm or flexible any of it is.

Why it matters. Mismatched timelines and borrowed motivation are the two things most likely to stall an otherwise promising match.

“Do they want children, when, and what kind of parent would they be?”

Whether they want children, how many, how soon, and how that fits their circumstances. What they would keep from their own upbringing and what they would deliberately do differently.

Why it matters. This is one of the few areas where a genuine difference is rarely negotiable, so it is better known now than later.

“What would an ordinary week with them look like?”

The real shape of their days — hours, meals, sleep, work, who is around. How much their friendships matter and what they expect to change after marriage. How they look after their health. What they do purely for pleasure, and how they travel.

Why it matters. Daily rhythm is what two people actually share, and a mismatch in it is felt every week rather than once a year.

“Where is their work heading, and how far would they move for it?”

What they do, where they want it to go, and what they are actually doing about it now. How they hold work against personal time, how far they would relocate and on what conditions, and where they picture themselves in the long run.

Why it matters. Relocation and working hours reshape a household, and both are far easier to discuss before an attachment forms.

“How do they handle money, and what would they expect at home?”

Whether they spend or save by instinct, whether a plan exists and whether they follow it, whether they are building anything, and how they would expect finances to work between two people. Report the habit and the expectation plainly.

Why it matters. Expectations about whose money is whose cause more trouble than the amount of it ever does.